Frequently Asked
Questions

Probably. We haven't been arrested yet. We also haven't started operations, which may be a factor.

From a regulatory standpoint, ejecting customers off a boat into the Atlantic Ocean using a canvas frame likely falls under maritime law, OSHA guidelines for recreational watercraft, and whatever jurisdiction covers "things that displace water." We're looking into it. The sticky note didn't cover this.

Short answer: we believe so. Medium answer: ask a lawyer. Long answer: see the investor pitch for context on our current regulatory status (optimistic).

The exo-skeleton handles that. Probably. The Canvas Exo-Skeleton is designed to displace water, which means you should float. The operative word here is "should."

All ticket tiers include a life jacket. The Bronze tier includes a standard life jacket. Silver includes a premium one. Gold includes a monogrammed one. These are legally required. Probably.

If you cannot swim and have concerns about being ejected off a boat into shark-adjacent New England waters, we recommend the Gold Skeleton for the 10-minute crew retrieval guarantee and the sense of status it provides.

See the map. (Yes.)

New England shark populations have been increasing, particularly in Maine and Cape Cod waters. The Cape Cod White Shark Conservancy is an actual organization that exists, which tells you something about the shark density near our primary operating zone.

Official Boaty McBoatface Ventures Shark Policy: Sharks are a documented environmental feature of our operating area. The Canvas Exo-Skeleton was designed with water displacement in mind. Whether this displaces sharks along with the water is an active area of R&D.

Vermont has zero sharks. We do not operate in Vermont. Vermont is landlocked. We include it on the map for completeness and state pride.

It was the only region on the sticky note. The yellow sticky note in the original business plan features a hand-drawn coastline that was subsequently identified as New England. This was a binding business decision.

We've considered expanding to other regions (the Gulf Coast, the Pacific Northwest, international waters) but the sticky note is the source document. Until we get a Series A and a second sticky note, New England is the market.

Also: New England has excellent boat culture, a robust lobster industry (unrelated), and the highest concentration of people who own Patagonia fleeces. These people will try anything.

Canvas. Hence the name: Canvas Exo-Skeleton.

Per the original purple sticky note, the frame is constructed of canvas with handles on either side. The interior accommodates a person. The sides are designed to create displacement when submerged. The diagram clearly shows a person lying inside what appears to be a canvas-framed apparatus with rigid side handles.

The Gold tier adds gold plating. This is aesthetic only. The canvas does not respond to gold. We tried this conceptually. It still displaces water at the same rate. The gold is for the look.

No. Well, maybe. Ask us again after the eject.

Officially: the Canvas Exo-Skeleton is rental equipment. You wear it, you get ejected, we retrieve it. It is then sanitized and made available to the next customer.

Unofficially: we haven't manufactured any yet, so the concept of "keeping" one is hypothetical. If you'd like to be first in line to potentially purchase a prototype, that's what the $2M investment round is for.

Fast. Very fast. We don't have numbers.

The eject mechanism is listed in our budget at $100,000. This covers the engineering, fabrication, and calibration of whatever system launches customers off the aft deck. We have not yet designed it. We have allocated funds for it.

What we can say with confidence: it will be fast enough to clear the stern, high enough to generate a satisfying arc, and slow enough that the exo-skeleton has time to orient itself for optimal water displacement.

For a live preview of the eject arc, try the interactive demo. That's accurate. We think.

Spiritually, yes. Legally, we're working on it.

The origin story is completely true: one week of assigned work, delivered as four sticky notes via text message, describing a boat ejection tourism company serving New England. The business plan is real. The sticky notes are real. The company is in the early stages of being real.

This website is a parody. But so was every great idea before it was a real one. The sticky note is the origin document. We stand by it.

To be explicit: This is satire. Please do not purchase a canvas exo-skeleton. Please do not get ejected off a boat. Please do not approach sharks. The map is real. The risk is real. The company is not (yet).

Tigershark had one week to develop a business plan and delivered it via sticky notes. That's the background. That's the experience. That's the founder story.

In venture capital, founder stories are everything. Tigershark saw a gap in the market (specifically, the zero-person gap in the canvas exo-skeleton boat ejection tourism vertical) and spent exactly one week filling it conceptually. Four sticky notes. One week. Zero hesitation.

If you're looking for prior experience in maritime tourism, canvas manufacturing, or ejection mechanics: none documented. If you're looking for vision: four sticky notes worth.

Unknown. The exo-skeleton is designed to hold a person. The specifications say "a person", not a specific kind of person. This is by design. Inclusivity is a company value.

What we can confirm: the eject mechanism will launch customers regardless of fitness level. The canvas exo-skeleton will displace water regardless of fitness level. The sharks will be sharks regardless of fitness level.

We recommend basic swimming ability, comfort with open water, and a willingness to be retrieved by a crew member within whatever the retrieval window is for your ticket tier. But honestly, the whole thing is hypothetical right now anyway.

You've already been ejected. The experience has occurred. There is no refund policy that addresses post-ejection regret.

Pre-ejection refunds are theoretically available within 24 hours of booking, provided the boat has not yet departed the dock, you have not yet been fitted with the exo-skeleton, and the eject mechanism has not been primed.

Post-ejection: you received the service. You displaced water. You were retrieved. The sharks did not get you. We consider this a successful outcome.

In 2016, the British National Environment Research Council ran a public vote to name a new polar research vessel. The public voted overwhelmingly for "Boaty McBoatface." The council named the ship the RRS Sir David Attenborough and assigned the name Boaty McBoatface to a small submarine. This is real. This happened.

Our founder is deeply aware of this event and considers it an inspiration. If a submarine can carry the Boaty McBoatface legacy into the deep ocean, a New England ejection tourism vessel can carry it into the Atlantic.

Also: it was the name on the sticky note. This was binding.